Posted by
KsReaganite on Sunday, April 05, 2009 5:39:03 PM
Unfortunately for us, it takes many, many innocent deaths and devastation to get our laws to be responsive to the need of the times. The most resistant to such changes are those whose livelihoods and careers depend on the legal status quo..i.e. the bar, the bench, and its coterie of bureaucratic court jesters (er..civil servants, I mean). In the grand procession of such tragedies, here is another one over the weekend from the state of Washington though I suspect it will be many more before legislators and lawyers finally say, ‘yes, we gotta change and to heck with the interest groups who are resisting this change’.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090405/ap_on_re_us/children_slain
In the story from Washington, as you read, it becomes evident that a man went over the edge. What pushed him to his murderous rage was not the fact that his wife was cheating; sadly in America of today that is a very common occurrence. Rather what triggered the suicidal-homicidal outburst was the realization of what his wife’s adultery meant for him legally: that he was going to lose his five children who would be left at the mercy of an unethical mother and her (series of) incumbent bedmates. Children who were likely to be abused or even killed by these ‘lovers’ of their mother while the father would have no recourse to protecting them.
That, readers, is what the actual application of divorce and custody laws means in most states of the Union. When wives cheat, our system rewards them for adultery, punishes the victimized husbands, destroys the familial ties between fathers and children so that potential abusers (also known as mother’s boyfriends/new husbands) can victimize defenseless children.
It is impossible to forgive what this man did; doubly so for myself as I am a borderline pacifist. It is not improbable to understand, however, what helplessness and frustration drove a father to do this when he realized that the courts will take his children away from him forever because his wife betrayed the family.
This tragedy is another clarion call to the deaf ears of legislators and journalists to get the laws to change so that no matter who divorces whom, the children are not divorced from either parent (and yes, the twice a month ‘visitation’ is a divorce from the parent indeed). No matter who divorces whom, the law must not mandate that, for all practical purposes, the children be divorced from good, decent parents. And yes, twice a week 'visitation' is just that: a court mandated divorce of children from parents.